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You’ve heard it: the wise words coming out of the respectable intelligent man. As the “big” words flow into your ears, you quickly sum up the interpretation and ideas. Yet at the same time, you thought, “man, just say what you mean already.” I’ve had that experience, boy, way too many times and I’m sure you have too. The use of “intelligent talk” to pass along a meaningless or careless ideas is a method many people use to appear better than others. It’s sad, really.
There are what is called the real philosophers and the philosophers-wannabe. In my opinion, an actual philosopher often won’t attempt to use their ways of thinking in order to benefit themselves but instead to benefit others. Think about it, if you have a great idea you would like to share, would you make it sound like it’s rocket science when it really isn’t? If your true purpose of sharing your ideas to simply share, you would try to make the other person understand as best they could. Misunderstandings only lead to nowhere, and wouldn’t you want to have a great discussion in the first place, anyway?
On the other hand, a philosopher-wannabe would often make their ideas sounds grandeur. A point that can be explained in a simple sentence turn into a long eloquent paragraph. Sure it sounds intelligent, but once you hear closely to the points that is being said, there are multiple repetitions and the use of unnecessary verbs and adverbs. Really, just get to the point already.
I’m a believer in simplicity and speed. The faster and more efficient one way is, the better. So I don’t see a point in wasting another person’s time trying to explain an idea simply to make myself look smarter. Let’s face it here, “big” words aren’t used in everyday language, only in written scholarly journals for its own separate purpose. If you can simplify a 30 page journal into a simple, yet content-heavy paragraph when trying to summarize a journal, then your original intent is kept. Simple, fast, to the point.
There is also the issue of purpose in starting the conversation in the first place. One is to simply share an idea, the other is to push that idea onto another person because one think that that’s the only idea that’s right. You can hear it in the person’s voice and words when they simply want to share. They will ask for your opinions and be open about it. In the end, it simply turns into a healthy discussion resulting in better understading of both sides’ points of view. On the contrary, a selfish and “all-righteous” individual would try and push their idea to the other person and not listen or even ask for the other person’s opinions.
Can you see where I’m going with this?
To all individuals trying to sell dignity and respect through blatant philosophical bullshit, please stop. Just get to the point, and be quick about it.
P.S. Sorry I haven’t written in a while, school’s been taking over my life.
“Shame on you for no religion.”
“Where’s your respect for your ancestors?”
I must say, I have grown even further away from my culture’s beliefs and ways of life. I don’t blame modernity and technology, really, I simply grew into a more individualized person who wish for no attachments with religion and silly customs. What do I get for voicing out my opinions? Criticism from my own blood relatives.
I have grown to be much more open in life, to accept things as they are, and to explore every inch of possibilities there are to offer. Arts, for example, is one way that I really express my thoughts and feelings. But sometimes, even arts can be viewed as taboo. Nudity, sex, profanity and everything in between are parts of arts itself. In my opinion, if that’s what it takes to express your artistic views, then that’s the only way there is. No need to shy away from honest expressions.
Unfortunately, even until today, I am still unable to express my views wholly. My views on sex, drugs, the beauty of nudity and using profanity. What will the family say!
“It’s not just all about you. It’s about our culture too, you have to preserve it.”
Aren’t I preserving my culture anyway? In ways that doesn’t require signing up for religion and following the customs. I am proud of my heredity, of my ancestors and the way the community live their lives. I am proud to be Indonesian, to have shared such rich background and be able to experience such different lifestyles. But I am me, and to be proud of my culture, I don’t think I HAVE to live the life everybody else is living.
In fact, I know many individuals who perhaps have the same ideas and thoughts as me, who wish to be more open and expressive, but are bound to the ties of their culture. The result? Hypocrites. Individuals who say one thing and do another. Who wears veils for nothing, who reads the Qur’an for nothing, and who live a life of lies. Who swears for no sex before marriage, who swears for no alcohol or drugs… lies. It’s a shame, really.
At least I’m honest. I am not brave enough to be as expressive as I’d like to be, but hey, I’m getting there. It isn’t easy to be slowly breaking away from the ways of one’s customs. It isn’t easy to be a separate individual. But perhaps and hopefully one day I will be able to express my thoughts in feelings in my own open ways. I’m sure some people will understand. I’m sure some people won’t judge me, won’t look at me from where I came from, whose family I was raised with and so on. I’m sure that there are and will be some people who will view my expressions for what they are.
Me vs. the culture. Today, I win.
Save the Earth. No. Save Ourselves.
Global warming swarms a panic. Environmentalists screams for help. The government is stressing out. Who are we kidding here? After watching and reading various documentations, studies and theories, I have come to a conclusion that it is not Earth we should be saving, instead it is ourselves and our fellow living organisms that live on Earth.
One of National Geography’s most treasured show (in my opinion) would be Earth: The Biography, among many others. The show premiered just last month and it took my breath away! Truly an amazing way of showcasing the history and biography of Earth, the planet us humans are living in. There are so many interesting facts that are shown in this documentary, and the one fact from a study that I found most intriguing is how Earth has gone through so many throughout its history of development.
Funny how we think that humans are destroying Earth. In fact, Earth is so strong and such a unique survivor that it withstand the attack of various meteors and soaring heat. Yes, humans are destroying Earth now, but Earth will survive, and Earth will return to its original form once humans are no longer capable of surviving in it.
Link this to another showcase from National Geography, Aftermath: Life After Humans which focuses on how the Earth will take over everything that humans have created and destroyed and return to its original true form. Mother nature will let pollution breathe itself out, leaving only clean air within merely 100 years. Imagine unpolluted air; oxygen that current humans never even naturally breathe.
Every civilization has an end, and so will the human civilization as well. We can only survive for so long in this weather and conditions. The Earth is changing so much, unfortunately much too fast for humans to keep up. Let’s face it, humans are not evolving as fast as we would like us to be. We are unable to live in sweltering heat, with not enough vegetation, harsh weather and short supply of other resources. Unfortunately, the end to humanity is not too far and the human civilization is short lived not by any other factor but humans themselves.
Well, there is no turning back now. The Earth will move forward with its course, changing and being changed, surviving every step of the way. But will the humans survive? Nope. What to do? Nothing.
There is only so much that the green living idea can do to our own survival. It is a way for us to slow down our own extinction. A way to slow down and let our later generations live on this Earth that we love so much. A chance to breathe some air, a chance to survive before the end of humanity. Thinking green day today will not undo the environmental harm that humans have done, but it will give humans the time.
Live your live to your fullest, said a good friend of mine, Ann Tran. It wouldn’t be long until our later generations would simply be wiped out by natural disasters triggered by human actions. Our time on Earth is coming to an end. Not in my lifetime or your children’s, but maybe your later generations. You only live once, and don’t take that to advantage because you have no idea how lucky you are to still be able to breathe the oxygen, here on Earth.
When a stranger is asked on what they think of America, the most common answer is the freedom it has to offer. There has been many rights and laws that protects almost every group of people and there is freedom in choice almost in anything and everything. But the truth is, is there?
“I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the Republic for which its stands, one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.” — The Pledge of Allegiance.
The word “under God” is added by President Eisenhower in 1954, passed, of course, by congress. So, is there really freedom in America? Freedom to believe in… whatever? What about those individuals who do not believe in God? How can they pledge in stating that America is a nation under God, while at the same time believing that God does not even exists?
Looking through the many leaders throughout history in America, Christianity is the one strong belief that many of these leaders hold. Then, let’s look at few teachings of Christianity: to disallow divorce, to view sex as sin, that murder is sin and that revenge is useless. Sure, at a glance, America certainly does not hold any restraints to divorce, sex, murder and revenge (i.e. the war). But look closer between the streets and behind the written pledge. The so called “God” is behind it all.
It is a fact that sex education has been very limited in many schools across the United States. Although it is, in fact, a very important aspect of education, especially among teenagers, many parents and boards of education deny the importance of sex education. These people believe that promoting sex education will only promote sex. That sex education is in line with sex itself, and therefore is against the teachings of the religion.
Sadly, across the globe, the United States is listed as the number one country with the highest number of under-age pregnancy and one of the lowest user of contraception. A coincidence? I don’t think so.
Then, the so very appraised “rights” of people which, sadly, is poorly taught. Let start with the Civil Rights, to free slaves and promote equal rights to those of African heritage. Look around. Do you see equal rights between those of the African heritage? The fight between whites and blacks are long from being over. It has been embedded in the culture itself, in the very talk of everyday and in the hearts of the Americans. Racism will always exist, and equality could never win.
Then the Women’s Rights, again, to give equal opportunity to women in all aspects of humanity. Sure, slowly women are taking the bigger work, becoming CEO’s and head contractors, even taking over positions in the parliamentarian. But look closer, and see that many of these women still are unable to be given the total and absolute respect that the rights is supposed to promise. Again, it has been embedded in the culture.
My explanation to this? Perhaps the celebration of rights and freedom is being promoted a little too much. Black History Month? How about White History Month? Or Chinese History Month? or Immigrants History Month? How can we find equality this way? How can we mark the calendars in celebration of one race, and one race only? Morgan Freeman, a famous celebrity, even stated on December of 2005 that Black History Month is “ridiculous… You’re going to relegate my history to a month?… I don’t want black history month. Black history is American history.” Touché.
Every single changes that happens in America is, in fact, the American history. I would say that focusing on any one type of rights and even mark the calendars with these celebration will not only cause a tiresome in preparation of the celebration itself, but it will only dis-promote equality.
So maybe our future generations will realize, that freedom and equality does not exist in written form, but it must exist in reality. Signatures and documentations of various rights will not succeed without the 100% belief from every single American individual. To unite America as a whole, I would say that we should look back into the history of America, up until this very day, and see which means the most to all of Americans, not just a group, but to all.
No partial history deserves a celebration of its own, the whole history should be celebrated together. No freedom should only be written in words and documentations, but is should be believed and act out in reality. Dear, free and equal America: you are not so free and equal, after all.
Perhaps it is human nature to always judge on other people. I do it too, just not all the time. I do admit that when introduced to someone, I will judge the person from their first impression. However, from learning from elders and with experience, I learned that judging could be different, and there are limits to how far you judge and how you judge someone.
One of the main common judge category is whether or not a person comes off as “likable and friendly.” Funny thing is, this is a very vague and dangerous way of judging someone. Throughout my life, I’ve met people who appears as friendly and in fact, wanting to be friends with me and being there for me. I guess the term “friends” could be different from person to person. As you get to know a person, you will find the deep down secrets and true intentions that they have, and often, it doesn’t sound to pretty.
Then, a person could also appear as “cold and submissive” yet their actual personality and intention could really match that of yours to a point that you can’t keep away from each other. This is also pretty common, I guess. Many have said that I give the first impression of a really snobby girl who over-analyze those around me and apparently I’m not very friendly neither. I guess I am trying to change that slowly and in fact I have changed in several areas 
My general motto is that everyone is different in their own ways. A person could be very child-like, very loud and short-tempered, very cold, very happy, and so on for their own reasons. I did not learn this quickly because I seem to always judge people simply from their appearance (what personality they are presenting), without having a neutral mind.
Keeping a neutral mind is not easy. I seem to have to tell myself to be patient, and to not be biased in judging people. I guess this comes with certain experience as well, which I will have to gain more in the future. I always keep a big picture, of different motives, the different environment and people that surrounds them and myself. In other words, I simply try to understand. In time when I don’t, I leave it be. Sometimes avoiding certainly people is the best way to avoid myself to jump into cruel, harsh and biased judgments.
So I guess I could judge people, but I would call it “smart judging.” To judge those around me with accordance to their motives and background and by keeping a neutral way of thinking – while being critical as well. It takes a lot for me to say that I dislike a person, I would call it “mis-match” but not dislike. The word “hate” is one I rarely use. Perhaps only once. Just once.
… Just a thought, I feel like writing this down before I let it roll off my mind.
After reading the many books by Alice Hoffman, Here on Earth is definitely the one that touched me the most. I would say, the best one so far. In this book, Hoffman is able to portray love as how it is in real life, cheating, real love, reality and somehow still able to collaborate her usual magical writing style.
*Some spoiler are present. But not to the extreme
This is one book that I HIGHLY recommend to anyone out there who loves reading about fiction that portrays love, life, romance, family, and different individuals. Perhaps Hoffman has been able to cover quite a numerous amount of different types of individuals within this one book. One which interests me in examining individually: their motives, characteristics, behaviors and personality.
There are some dark sides to this book, though. It hurts me whenever Hoffman writes a sexual intercourse scene in a really rough and dirty way. I feel as if when she writes this, it makes me really dislike to whole situation. Maybe that’s what’s she’s trying to make the readers feel, and that’s exactly the results. There are scenes where Hollis, the “Mr.Death” as one would say, were having sex (note: not making love) with March Murray who’s been in love with him since they were young. I am glad that Hoffman separates Hollis as a young and Hollis when he grew up because they are two completely different individuals.
I’ve learned quite a bit by just reading this novel. That love could drive a person blind, so blind that they would let themselves be abused, beaten up and even stranded to die. Yes, there are a lot of abusive actions going on the books. Hoffman portrays Belinda (Hollis’ first wife) as to one that is too kind and so kind that she won’t admit that she’s being abused. And that’s exactly what abused women do, they are so kind, so in love, so distorted that they are unable to make choices for themselves. They believe in a surreal reality, lost in dreams, unable to make out the reality any longer. Friends and family tried to help, but they can only do so much because the only person who could stop the abuse is the woman herself. Yes. The woman herself is the one who has the full power to leave the relationship and get legal help. Thankfully that’s exactly what March Murray did. She finally awakens at the end of the story. She finally open her eyes to reality.
Another lesson is how a wife could love her husband so much that even when her husband is in love with another woman, she stayed by his side so lovingly. Until they grew old and died together. This type of love makes me cry, because the man has never meant to hurt the woman’s feeling. But he can’t help but falling in love with the other woman. Until the other woman (who’s loved by everyone in town) died. The man still loves the dead woman, but his wife is still by his side. As his best friend, he would feel, but she loves him much much more than that.
As soon as I closed the book (which only took me about 4-5 hours to read by the way), I was trembling. Abusive men are scary. Just reading Hoffman’s story makes me scared and tremble. The way they could make a woman feel like they’re the only one in the world, the way he could make them stay, shut up and the way they could control them anyway he wants. Such manipulation, it’s scary. Oh I can only wish that my man won’t turn into such beast. Such beast who deserves a new perspective in life – which is almost impossible to do.
The abusive man, Hollis, is one who has nothing and received everything at one. All just to proof to the world that he’s worth a lot more than what used to. But his ways are evil, he used trickery, and nothing legal. All to proof that he’s powerful. So powerful that he could have any women in town feel like their the only one he loves. So powerful that he could let his wife die in his own house of acute pneumonia. Scary. Real scary.
Hoffman even mentions how a judge thinks of domestic violence cases. How impossible it is to help the victim, when the victim her/himself does not speak out. How easy it is to tell a lie out of a victim, all to get themselves away from safety. What can a judge do? No proof. No charges.
Basically, this book is one worth reading and examining. It makes you rethink about what real love is all about. How your perception of love could change when you’re 15, 20, 40 and 60. Or if that “love” have anything to do with it all, maybe it’s something else entirely but we simply have no word for it? Maybe that feeling of possessiveness, of ownership, of wanting each other so much is not love? Interesting, right? They said that one could love a man/woman that they would do anything for them, even if it includes being beaten up and abused? What kind of love would that be? Is that really love at all?
Maybe we should rethink the word “love” by itself…
They call it the energy of the soul that has spent their days on Earth and won’t leave. Do you believe this? That even those who died, their energy would still linger much longer than their bodies, here on Earth. I do. I believe in the energy of the souls. Imagine all of that energy that one human could produce, you think it would just be eliminated in an instance? I don’t think so.
Maybe their energy is being left behind as chill, or heat. Maybe as you touch their items, you would feel their energy once they’re gone. Or being in their space. Or maybe that energy is being presented as shadows, black figures, wind, light. Maybe that goosebumps behind your neck, as if someone is watching you, but really, there isn’t anybody. Yes, that energy indeed. And some may see a complete figure – well, I don’t know if that’s luck or quite the opposite.
Do you believe that places could be haunted? That you yourself could be haunted? Individuals could be followed by that energy. Or maybe it’s just in the person’s mind. For he/she who couldn’t forget those that have left them, they let those energy linger within them, and all around them. Which would you agree with?
The only person I have personally known and lost is my grandmother and I often feel her presence. My mom told me that I may have a sixth sense. Do note that I come from a very spiritual-believing family. We believe in fate, in wandering souls, in ghosts and in other spiritual beings. That being said, I know that my grandmother is watching me. Sometimes I could feel her sitting right next to me. We had a bond, which we unfortunately could not make any much stronger since she left when I was young. We were apart. She wanted to see me during the last minutes of her life. That tore my heart apart. Where’s Santi? I want to see her… And I was 15 hours flight apart, separated by land and sea. But now her energy is here, often, but not always. Is it because I let it? Or does it have a mind of its own?
That which we can not see, we question endlessly. What we can not touch, what we can not proof with science, are nothing but dreams, thoughts and imaginations. But could this be true? Then how is it that I could feel or sometimes see the energy during times when I least expected it to?
I believe in ghosts. How about you?
I feel pity for the thousands of homeless people who are scattered all over Baltimore. Sure, but only for so much. It’s sad to see how people use suffering as a way to get their hands on things that only bring them further suffering (i.e. alcohol, cigarettes, drugs, etc.) Would I give money to those who beg? Absolutely not. They will not get a penny from me, not at all.
My last experience trying to help a stranger happened during summer 2005. I was on my way home from work in Washington, DC when a lady asked me for a favor. She started asking me about the parking lot across the metro station, particularly about the time they re-open. This lady’s clothing was quite raggidy, but at the time, it didn’t appear as worth suspecting. She was and seemingly frail, and apparently she was having trouble going back home because her car is stuck in the parking lot which is already closed. She asked for my name, and I gave it too her, not my real name of course. This conversation went from okay to worse. This stranger started asking me for money, about $50 she said. Quickly I realized just what situation I’ve gotten myself to. I stepped back, gained my common sense and told her that I was unable to help her. She went ballistic on me! In the middle of public she started screaming that I am “one careless person who wouldn’t want to help a helpless old lady.” Well I walked away right away of course, leaving the scene and leaving the lady in distress. That was the last time I tried helping a stranger.
If you really need help, wouldn’t you go for more reasonable ways? Maybe call the cops if you really don’t know where you are, I’m sure they will direct you to some social services somewhere along the way; they will certainly help you find whatever it is you’re looking for. Asking favors from people rushing through the streets is not an idea. Plus, how would I know that you really need help. Am I right?
If you are helpless, jobless and couldn’t figure out what to do, there are programs out there reaching out for you trying their best to get you back to life. For those refugees who’ve lost their homes to the hurricane, for those who are kicked out of their homes because they couldn’t get out of debt… I wish I could help them directly, but mixing between the I-lost-all-my-money-to-cocaine crowd does not make the job easier.
From the way I see it, there is almost no way that you could find no job; no way of making a living. If you have a social security, you are basically given a list of jobs that you could work for. And that list could only go on and on and on. We hear it all the time, people who started out as the trash collector, ended working for the company for a long time and joined the management team. There is always a way to work up the hierarchy. Only if you have the willpower, which unfortunately a lot of people in the U.S. do not have.
Haven’t they realized just how many immigrants fight their way into this country because of the job opportunities around? Haven’t they realized that people actually row boats and swim across borders to get their feet here in the U.S., the land of opportunity. They fought to get a working permit, to be allowed to work, to be allowed to make a living. Yet here many who are given the opportunity choose to waste it to drains.
If I have my way of helping these individuals, I would rather help through programs that I believe in. I’m sure there are programs out there to help these homeless people to get back on their feet and use the opportunity that they are given out there in the working world. I’m sure there are such programs. I just don’t believe in simply giving. I believe in training those people. Train them to be able to realize what they have, and train them to able to battle it out there out in real world.
Maybe I went from feeling pity for them, to feeling how they are pathetic. Sad, huh?
*Note the grammar on this sentence, if someone would fix it for me, I’d be glad to fix it *
Many believes that personality changes. But really, it’s not our personality that changes. This is something I learned in Personality Psyc (yes I paid attention). The fact that, surprisingly, our personality remain steady throughout our entire life. So what really makes us think that “people change”? What really changed is not the person, but it’s their needs, and perhaps their principles.
As I was talking to a couple of my friends, we discussed simple issues of when we were young. How we always thought of tattoos and ear piercings are taboo. How we (at least I) always thought that the color pink is a color worth despising. Guess what, I have grown to love the color pink and piercings as well loving the idea of a tattoo. And so did my friends.
That’s the simple portrait of change that we go through in our life: our change of perception or viewpoint towards the issues around our environment.
I remember how I think when I was 13, or 14 and 15… Now that I’m looking back at myself back then, how I always thought that I’m “mature” but really I’m not. I was just another egoistic-self-absorbed teenager who happens to be hit with life’s tiny little troubles. And I thought I was special. Huh. I’ve grown to understand that every family has their own dark spots and every life has their own bitterness. And I shouldn’t asked for sympathy.
Then we come to relationships and how we change throughout our entire life. I would say that a good-working relationship is one which both partners are able to grow and change alongside each other. Yes, when I said “change,” it certainly means our needs and principles. Also to grow and mature into adulthood and be able to support each other when both are changing rapidly.
It may sound easy, but it really isn’t. Change is one the most common reason for relationships to end (according to my own experience, yes I am making a weak inductive argument here). I see people around me break up because they are unable to provide or receive their needs. We mistakenly use the common term “he/she simply changed, we’re not quite fit with each other anymore” when really nobody changed, but their needs changed.
As you can see, as we grow older and maturer, we discover new things in our life and we will “bloom” into one step a better person each time. We learn new things everyday – this part is true, but we also grow each time we learn something new. If you are able to withstand alongside your partner(s) (friends, romance, family, etc.) while you constantly change then your relationship can be concluded as strong.
I would say that this is a good time to examine ourselves and how much our needs have changed in the past and how our perception/viewpoints grew. The word “wise” would be a better fit here; as we discover new things, we grow wiser. Also examine those around you and cherish those who’ve been with your for a long time. Your parents included (your needs have changed and so did theirs), are your relationship strong? Have you adapted? Or have you simply rejected the other partner’s change in perspective/needs/principles and leave them?
Cheers.
Perhaps there’s a plan written for me out there. Follow your instincts. What if my instincts are bad? What if I’ve made the wrong decision after all?
I am in my junior year of college and I’m struggling. Bad. I feel like I’ve made a mistake to even move to Baltimore in the first place. Yes I’ve gained experience and made lots of new friends. But what now? I’m stuck with no money whatsoever. Living away from home is difficult. I didn’t expect it to be this difficult. I didn’t expect it to be so expensive. I’m not ready.
It’s my fault to have pushed myself to my own limits. I should have listened, “it’s better that you wait, you’re not going to make it on your own, you’re not ready.” But I closed my ears and pretended they were wrong. I was selfish. I let my ego took over me. I should’ve… I should’ve… I should’ve…
If I keep saying that I wouldn’t get anywhere, wouldn’t I?
I called for guidance, and I found none. I literally trembled scared. I’m scared. Why wouldn’t I? But I know that I will get through this. I’m on my own, yes. But this time I have to make the right decision and I will listen better. I’ve made a mistake. In fact, I made lots of mistakes. But I guess that’s the road to adulthood? Making mistakes and fixing them? Learning what’s right and what’s wrong.
And I guess letting my ego won was wrong.
… I’ll update more when I figure out what to do next. I myself don’t even know what I’m going to do next. It’s like a mystery…
